Jan
Plea From The Falling
So, I’ve been trying to stay away from rhyming poetry as of late because I find it so easy to fall back on and because I often lose sight of my message till I’ve found ‘just’ the ‘right’ words- even though we should all know by now that the right words don’t exist. The art is in painting a beautiful picture with all the wrong ones and letting it shine with crooked light. :)
Last night I woke to find myself at my laptop frantically trying to open some program or another just to type these words- the few quickly becoming the many in just a few short lines. Images assailed me from a particular handful of ideas but as I wrote it morphed and turned on me. This morning as I opened my laptop and skimmed those solid lines I found things I hadn’t seen. It was beautiful.
I’ll tell you what the poem’s based on in a second post because I’m probably going to ramble and I know people tend to avoid longer ones, so if you read nothing else please at least skim my poem. I know my rhyming scheme is a bit childish but the greatest beauty I’ve found in writing comes from not caring about anything but the under-script.
Plea From The Falling
Tell me a darker story
bathed in broken glory,
of opened wounds
and sealed tombs,
tinted with the shadow’s touch.
Whisper to me
my secrets to be freed,
from the hellish twist
of love with a fist,
and dogs for better mothers.
Relive the once forgotten
no more the ill begotten,
with tears and ink
bleeding what we truly think,
before gravity shreds another angel’s wings.
I know it’s not great but I felt compelled to share it. :)
05Jan
you could tighten up a few things but this is an example of how rhyme can actually do some good work in the poem. i could see this poem appearing in a fantasy type story. wonder if anyone has ever written a fantasy story where the main character was a writer? hmmm
05Jan
I’ve had several story ideas (packed tightly inside a special folder in my brain) where the main character is a writer- some of which the whole plot line revolves around story telling. You’ll have to remind me to tell you about ‘Other World’ and ‘Inkmortal’ some time. ;)
I agree, I think I know which lines need tightening up. I might bring a new rewrite over the whole thing and see what happens.