Remember Who You Wanted To Be?
May 27th, 2009
suggested by Blogletting.com
“My neighbor has a bumper sticker that reads: “Remember Who You Wanted To Be”. Did you grow up to be who you always wanted to be as a child?”
To be honest? I’m not exactly sure I ever seriously wanted to be anything when I was growing up. Actually, I’m still growing up so let’s just say- when I was little.
I do remember, very vaguely, my bio mother telling me once that I told her I wanted to be a ‘Vegetarian’ when I grew up when instead I meant ‘Vertrinarian’ which by the way is a job I would be absolutely horrible at. How do I know this?
A few years ago I job shadowed at a Veterinary clinic, it was mandatory for my life skills class which in turn was mandatory for aging out of foster care (something I ended up not needing to worry so much about in the end). Overall it was a fun and educational experience but it’s not something I would ever want to do. I remember having to watch while they sedated this cat who had a huge tumor on his neck and not only do I not have a stomach for that sort of thing… you have to have a sort of detachment towards the creatures you’re working with and I just can’t do that.
Have you ever taken you pet to the vet and thought that they acted a little cold? This is because if they were their emotions on their sleeves they’re likely to let them get in the way of their job. I can detach when I need to but it’s not something I can continuously make myself do. In my head I need to go full force forward with emotions and use them as a guide and while that works for a lot of things… the medical field, of any sort, isn’t one of them.
So, what else did I want to be while I was growing up?
Well, a few years ago I used to tell everyone I wanted to be president just to see what they would say but that was never very serious.
I’ve always wanted to be an activist of one sort or another but that’s seldom a job in and of itself.
My bio mother wanted me to be an artist and during my last years of middle school I used to tell everyone I wanted to be a graphic designer but then I discovered that I really don’t like drawing when it’s something I ‘have’ to do.
I look back now on all the different things I’ve thought about being when I was a little kid but the thing is- they were really never things that ‘I’ thought up. They were always things suggested to me, half-hearts, or influenced by another. I don’t really think I ever honestly wanted to be anything. When I was that age, any age before a few years ago, I never really thought I was going live long enough to call myself a grown up and for a lot of the time- that was a pretty true assessment.
Nowadays? Things are a lot different. I have so many options now, so many things I ‘want’ to be it’s almost overwhelming.
Who am I kidding?
It ‘is’ overwhelming!
But I love it so it’s okay. :)
Hehe, I did this exact same MindBump a few nights ago, too. It’s a really interesting one, isn’t it?
I’m so there with you on the things I wanted to be growing up having been things that were suggested to me! It was a long time before I learned how to weed through what people suggested (or even, what grew in my own mind BASED on what people had suggested) and figured out what I wanted. It was also a long time before I learned to disregard, for the most part, what other people said.
You’re right, it’s exciting when there are so many options to chose from. I think it’s really important to listen to yourself, but sometimes other people do have valid things to offer. I’ve always that what I did as a child set me up to learn some important lessons as a teenager/young adult, namely, that no mistake is significant enough to destroy your life, because “your life” is fluid and constantly changing, never the same.
@ Chibi: It is a pretty good one. I absolutely love that site.
*nods* I think we’re all that way at one point in time or another, some of us a little more than others, but it’s a beautiful thing when you can finally see what you’ve wanted to be without any strings attached. Now I’m at the point in my life where the one thing I want to be is the one thing no one ever tried to suggest to me. :) My adoptive parents only suggested I spend more time on my writing and boom! :) Career choice. :) I loves it.
That is a fun question isn’t it?
The only thing I can remember doing as a kid that I always seemed to enjoy was playing school and I was ALWAYS the teacher. Now I know I couldn’t teach FUll-time in a classroom with kids because I’ve done subbing but teaching in some capacity I could do.
The one I know for sure that was wrong as a kid was when I thought I should be a nurse. Nope. I don’t have the patience for it!
@ Jessie:
LOL, nurse. That’s worse than vet. :) I could not deal with blood or sick people, it’s just not happening. I could totally see you as the teacher type though. You’re wise an not afraid to show it. ;)