Hey It’s A Picture!

I Wonder

Dedicated to Jo who unknowingly inspired me.

I wonder about the perspective of the size of the universe. Let me explain this one. Think of a cell with it’s Nucleus and all it’s other parts. Then think about how millions of billions of cells can create a person. If that cell is like a tiny world than a person is like a universe. Like our cells lets say we make up our planet. This planet and all the other spinning rocks in our known universe are cells that make up the universe.

If our universe is expanding is that not unlike mitosis (gods I hope that’s the right word), the process where cells split and multiply? Could our one universe created by our once big bang (the start of the cell) be one among many other universes? Could we be part of one infinitely huge person and not know it? On the reverse end of things couldn’t our cells be like teeny tiny universes within us?

I wonder if I fit under the medical definition of insane. Seriously. If I told someone with some credentials about some of the things I think, see, hear, and believe- I wonder if they’d put me on medication or ask me when I would like to schedule my next appointment.

I wonder if I have a Doppelganger.

I wonder if humans really truly are the only sentient creatures on this planet.

I wonder how some people can do what they do. How can mother’s beat their children? Children leave their mothers? How can someone abandon one person for another? How is it that one person can’t stand to kill a spider while another would massacre an entire family? How can we stand to go to war an kill our own kind at all? How can we look at one nation or army as the enemy when they are the same as us? How can  we have persecuted one race over another? How is it we have survived this long as a whole when we are so divided within?

I wonder what happened to honor.

I wonder what’s so wrong with ‘sex’ is everywhere’. Finish reading before you kill me. People are constantly gibbering about sex in the media, sex on TV, sex in movies, sex on clothing, sex in advertising, sex in everything. Yeah, I know some people don’t want their children exposed to such advertising and I don’t blame them one darn bit (note: when I say sex I mean sex appeal) even if they aren’t showing body parts parents have a right to try and influence their children and keep them away from that stuff until they are old enough to understand- sadly not enough parents use this right.

Now, that aside- what is so wrong with sex appeal in the media? It’s a basic human function that both pleasurable and leads to the continuation of the race. If people in general would quit treating the concept like such a bad taboo thing then kids wouldn’t be into it half as much. What’s the fun in doing something everyone considers commonplace after all? Note I’m not talking about the act of sex itself but sex appeal, using women in bikinis to get teenagers to buy said bikinis because they think they’ll look like that or the the next slutty shirt because some girl on TV wore it and then suddenly had all these guys all over her. If we quit treating sex appeal like a bad thing it will quit being a bad thing. Instead of putting it down all the time we should be talking to today’s generation and explaining that while yes, getting the slutty shirt will bring guys to you but that it will bring the wrong kinds of guys to you and explaining to them what they should wear so they don’t look like one night stands. Or we should talk to them and explain why they aren’t old enough to need relationships, etc.

I wonder what it is that makes anime so awesome. :)

I wonder about a bird and his wings. Perhaps to the bird flight is viewed much like we view walking, sometimes tedious, sometimes exhilarating, sometimes it’s just a way from point A to point B, but since birds have feet and thus can walk too but rather fly I choose to believe the more romantic notion- it must be wonderful! I want to be a bird for a day, to spread my winds and stretch them far. To push them down against the air and feel my self propelled, to swoop and dive, and feel the air fighting against me or to bank into it. *sigh* So wonderful.

I wonder what famous authors think when others use their world to write fanfiction. I imagine I would be flattered but it’d be hard to say.

I wonder where my puppy Kitty is and if he’s alright. My mother gave him away nearly five years ago.

I wonder why I wonder certain things. There are many things I don’t have questions about but at the same time I don’t know the answers to the questions I could have. Why is it I question the things I do?

I wonder what it is precisely that helped certain great minds come to the science, philosophy, spiritual, and other stuff altering conclusions other than other people. What was it that made Einstein or Aristotle realize certain things before others? What was it that allowed them to understand or see past what everyone else considered the known universe?

I wonder about my past. So many questions and so few answers. Answers that have no questions and questions that can’t be put into words.

I wonder what people see when they look at me, when they speak to me, when I write to them.

I wonder why… a lot.

I Am, I Think, I Have, I Know

Yays! Wonderful Jo has tagged me for a meme. *big grin* I absolutely love these things and I love answering questions like this. It makes one really think.

I tag… well, anyone who wants it (*pointedly pokes Keiyou*) because I’m feeling lazy and making the links is a pain in the bum since my glasses are missing… er, well, more like misplaced but still, lol.

I am: a story unto myself that is constantly unfolding and being written beneath my feet as if my prints upon the sand were the words I live by.
I think: my brain works differently- more so than I am capable of understanding. Sometimes it’s like my thoughts and the way I see things stem from a different lobe than most people’s.
I know: it will all work out in the end.
I have: more passion than I often know what to do with and it can sometimes get me into trouble.
I wish: I could share my peace and comfort with those who need it most. I also wish, though this is a more selfish one, that I could show my wings to the few very close people who will have understood this comment.
I hate: hate. There are a handful of things I’d like to say I hate but I cannot. There is even a person I would like to say I hate, thought I am ashamed to admit it, but I refuse. To hate something would be to sink down to a level I am not willing to tread.
I miss: my most cherished memories, fleeting moments in time that are so very precious to me.
I fear: the loss of my loved ones.
I feel: constantly on the brink of great discovery.
I hear: tangled thoughts spinning webs between my ears, some meant to entrap me and others meant to set me free.
I smell: nothing. My nose is full of snot. Does snot have a scent?
I crave: safety. Every day feels like a day in the shoes of a foreigner, like I’m in a land of people who’s customs are so unlike my own. It often leaves me feeling unsteady and frightened.
I search: for the right questions to all my answers.
I wonder: about many, many things. For this alone I would have to make a post and a half just to scratch the surface.
I regret: nothing as all things I ‘could’ regret have brought me where I am today and I wouldn’t trade this moment in time for all the riches or knowledge in the realms.
I love: my Hunny, of course. :)
I ache: when I don’t watch the path my thoughts take too carefully.
I am not: who I once was before.
I believe: in what I believe because I have seen, and felt, and touched far too much not to.
I dance: when the words can’t come out fast enough or when the rain is pouring down from the sky with a thunderous appeal.
I sing: utter nonsense… *grin* …to the casual listener.
I cry: a little less with each bit of love I’m given to heal the places in my soul that once were broken.
I don’t always: listen to my own advice.
I fight: the universe from time to time but that’s all part of learning and growing inwards.
I write: and write, and write, and write, and write, and write, and write, and write, and write, and write… to infinity evermore.
I win: every time I am able to help another soul. It brings me great joy just to see someone else smile.
I lose: nothing I don’t willingly give. The universe is full of rewards if we are but willing to brave the rapids of life and go get them.
I never: say things I don’t mean. I’m much too lazy for such a meticulous hobby. Lies are like a knot around me, it’s difficult to remember where the string begins and ends let alone untie the mess without being caught.
I always: have hope.
I confuse: myself from time to time. :)
I listen: with my heart, for even when my hearing diminishes with age it is the ear that will never lead me astray.
I can usually be found: in the midst of weaving words.
I am scared: of an impending moment that I know will come no matter how hard I push fate. There is a chance this moment could break me if I am not given enough time to heal from all my other wounds.
I need: to remember my needs.
I am happy about: so much. Sometimes my newfound smile hurts because I’m unused to grinning so much.
I imagine: I am many people, in many places, with many pasts, presents, and purposes. I wear many faces, genders, and ages, and I walk many paths of life. Such is the awesome’ness of being a crafter of stories.

Thankies for this present of insight Jo. :)