Mar
Eeek!
You know what? Sometimes I very much dislike how my brain absorbs things. I mean this in a fluffy and not ‘entirely’ serious way though at the moment I am truly annoyed.
I was toying with an idea and a new character for a project that is only half hearted right now. It’s just kind of drifting around my head trying desperately to latch onto something and hasn’t yet. It’s one of those ideas I expect to sock me in the face a week from now and demand to be written once it’s caught enough mental debris to become something.
I’ve was thinking about the character, putting him in different situations and such. It’s no surprise he turned out to have some Tao related philosophies. That’s just my main focus right now so the fact that it’s bleeding through into my writing is no shock whatsoever. What is a shock is that there was no way I could make this character work in my usual fantasy type writing because of it. He just ‘flowed’ through every conflict and became uninteresting. I mean he was still a cool character but I couldn’t get him down. He was just too happy even when things were bad and thus didn’t seem plausible enough to me.
On another hand, that I sometimes wish I had as an extra hand is always handy (yeah, bad pun, too much caffeine), the Taoist philosophies are also bleeding through into a lot of my other works in a very, very awesome way. Giving my characters beliefs, and for some of them a motivation that I had never used before. It’s very interesting.
Still, I’m just annoyed because this character became a lot more Tao involved than myself. They didn’t let anything get them down and fully lived how they chose to live no matter what was going on around them. They stayed positive inside. I’m not there yet. Could I be jealous of my imagination? Is this my internal writer’s way of telling me it’s starting to take the advice of the Tao Te Ching, Just1More (
), my Hunny, and every other person, place, and thing that’s been telling me to be more positive?! Even my horoscope is against my darker nature. Not that I put much stalk in those but serious this is was mine said a couple of days ago…
Your subconscious imagination is negative — counter it by hanging with fun friends.
I mean- what the heck?! Not that this is a bad thing it’s just I must really be dense to need all these signs and then some to tell me to lighten up. Been talking to my spirits more lately and as far as I can tell even they agree. This is all a good thing though and there is a lot more light coming through me, inwards and outwards. :)
05Mar
it’s not always easy to do/change something, even if you know/feel it is right, especially if it’s a change to some large part that so influenced you before. i still get major attacks of the negative, and monster pulls toward wetdays, but sometimes change comes slowly –in those babysteps– even when a firm decision has been made. don’t be hard on yourself, but do let you do for yourself what you would want for your friends and loved ones, and what you feel is right and best for you. i reckon our “bad/dark” side is simply our ego trying to hold us back from the “perfection” we once were, and can be again. :->
05Mar
I’ve been in a similar state lately… there’s been all these different characters introducing themselves to me, and I am struggling as to how I can include them in my writings. Ahhh!
Well, your writing has once again inspired me to abandon my “perfectionism” and be bolder!
Take care you!
– Jo
05Mar
Surely Sir Taoism can get caught on something. Quite true that the majority of people prefer to read about streams stopped up by rocks that eventually forge new paths than streams that peacefully flow around the rocks, never stopping.
05Mar
J1M: Indeed!!! Even if it is trying to hold us back though I can’t help but be a little thankful for the dark within us all (the tiny dark places, not the big bad ones) because without darkness I don’t think I could really see the light. That and we wouldn’t have a lot of awesome stories, after all what is a book without conflict to overcome. Also, what is strength without what one must overcome to reach it? Alas, I fear I’m rambling. On a side note, I ‘am’ currently starting to notice a big change in a lot of my thoughts. I don’t say or think a lot of negative things anymore. Or I rephrase things, kind of like that mental reprogramming you and I talked about a long time back. :)
Jo: Awesome! Be bold, perfect has no place in this world and every little crack, crumple, wrinkle, and tear only serve to add beauty to that which it adorns. I’ve discovered that notebooks are excellent for that sort of thing. I have a lot of characters on ‘lay away’ that I’m keeping in reserve for other stories because I just can’t use them in any of my current projects. :)
Crazy Monkey: Wow, it’s good to see you around. :) I’m not sure. I need to give him some sort of fear or something so unignorable (wonder if that’s a word?) that he forgets his philosophical lifestyle for a moment and then has to overcome that. :) We’ll see, for now I’ll just have to put him on lay-away.