Just A Tangent
September 23rd, 2007
I’ve just woken up, it’s my day off, and I’m already all revved up to write. Not sure which story I want to work on, probably Nmd. since it’s still fresh in my mind and I don’t think I’ll be able to outline it very well. I think I’ll just start in the middle of the story and work my way forward, flashing back and ‘remembering’ when needed.
For a long time I’ve wanted to write something like this, so close to my soul yet far at the same time. There’s so much hurt and pain in the world and maybe I can’t change that- one person alone has so much potential but in the end they are still bound by their minds. I know no other way I can do my part than to write it down. Use the craft of creation through the process of warping words to suit my vision. Who knows maybe what I write will motivate someone else, someone who will know what to do, who will help the world change in a bigger way than I can.
I wish people really did understand how many children are out there waiting for good homes to go to for warmth and shelter, and with hope in their hearts, maybe family. Sometimes a ‘good’ home just isn’t enough. Family is what makes a home. They had trouble understanding that in my very last foster home. I hated it there though it was one of the better ones. It was just a house where a bunch of strangers lived under the rule and instruction of two people. We watched their family and some of us saw our own. I wanted no part in it. They were not our family.
I don’t classify family as a biology just so you know. I have some biological family out there but I don’t know them. Sometimes I wonder if I really want to. I’ve only recently met my brothers and I do love them. They are the only family I think I really truly know at this point though I’ve started to meet others. They are more like acquaintances. My family is made from friends and other people who’ve gotten to know me and who I feel connected with. People who in the end make a mutual decision to love one another in a family manner are family. There was no love where I was living otherwise it would have so much better. It was just there job to look after us and nothing more.
Look at me, I’ve begun to ramble. This story hits so close to home. Wish me strength as I write it please. I’ll need it.
